How to find your person
How to find your own person – one or the other with whom you want to live for many years, wake up every morning, hold hands together and know that this is your closest person?
The first is to believe that such a person exists, that you need such a miracle and you should look for such a person. The second is to start an active search. Third, look for the one you need, the right person for you. We will talk about this here.
Two women’s extremes in choosing a partner are money and feelings. On the one hand, starting from a certain amount of men’s incomes, women stop worrying about the age of a man and the peculiarities of his character. In Japan, this is the annual income of a man 10 million yen (450.000 rubles per month), in Russia the amount is lower and depends on the region. The other extreme is feelings, exactly that love, then fears “Ah, suddenly, nobody will take me at all!”.
It often seems that telling women that you need to turn on your head when you get married is an empty thing. While talking, women listen, they write everything down, and then either they fall in love, they stop thinking, or they marry with fear: because they fear that this man is her only opportunity, and the other will not take it. And when a woman is afraid, all reasonable considerations fly out of her head. Then she is next to this strange male creation, which is not located to make money. And now he thinks – what to do? I bought a refrigerator, but it does not work.
To search for someone you need and to be able to understand: whether this person is right for you or not, it is useful to use the following internal tools.
Filter “Magnet – Native – Equal – Needed – Semeynik”. If you take care of yourself, you will look for the person who suits you. He pulls you to a man, he is your own, he is your peer, he is needed in life, he is family oriented: we take! As for love, falling in love can both help you and prevent you from building a future relationship.
Model “Functions of husband and wife.” If you care about who you are going to live with, you will think about how you fit him. Being a wife is a definite, difficult job. It means to be able to be a friend, a mistress, a housewife, a business card, a mother, a helper in the affairs of her husband … It is useful to think about all this.
Tips: How to find out who is next to you? Watch and estimate is important, but the most reliable test of your fantasies is a test of life. How to do it? How to find out who is next to you?
It is equally important to know what you offer in return. Think about it: you found your man, you met him. And why should he be interested in you, what can you offer him in return? What are you standing on the marriage market?
If you live not only with feelings, if you know how to control yourself and answer for yourself, if, apart from your needs, there are values for you, another love is possible for you: love as choice, commitment and dedication.
Today I teach people all the wisdom of relationships and put them thinking in the framework of the University of practical psychology. On the one hand, this is a two-year professional training for coaches, consultants and coaches, on the other hand, these are two years of personal development and the acquisition of important psychological skills.