Do you know how to love? Art of love
Few people can love. If the main thing for you in love is to receive from your beloved what you need, you love yourself, not him, and in this sense you don’t know how to love.
If you love apples, what remains of this love? – A bit of …
Love is a reflection of a person’s personality. The love we are used to is not what we do, it is what happens to us, what we fall into. Speaking according to science, such love is a reactive attitude, it is an involuntary behavioral and emotional response of a human body to what has affected it in this direction. However, people can be not only organisms, sometimes they have reason and will, and then they can be responsible for their choices and for their feelings. In this case, another love is possible, rare love, love as a choice, decision and behavior. This is the choice of a person to love and this is love as a behavior – like what a person does every day. And then how to choose that or those to whom you will give your love?
To love is to love the one you love, to think about him, to take care of him. Somehow I had such a conversation with a teenage girl: “Do you know how to love? Do you think in love of yourself or your beloved?” – “I can, I always think of my beloved!” – “Well, if you have agreed to meet, but he is not there, what do you think about and how? Do you think about him or about yourself?” – “Of course, about him! If I thought about myself, I would think how unhappy I am. And I think about him: what a parasite he is!”
I’m still not sure how much this was a joke. Or not a joke? In any case, the fact that this girl was at least ready to speak and think on this subject is wonderful: even this is often missing …
I asked one teenager if he loved his mother. “Yes!” he answered confidently. “Why do you think so?” – I tried to find out. “And I always eat what she gives me!” – he answered. In his vision, this is enough to assume that he loves his mother. Is mama’s love something better? “Senya, quickly go home!” – “Mom, am I cold or hungry?” – Yes, mother loves, but sometimes you want to escape somewhere from such love. If you don’t turn your head on, your love may turn out to be a natural disaster for your loved one.
Love needs to learn. It is necessary to learn to love so that our love serves not us, but our beloved.
The ability to love – the ability to convey their love so that it is understood as love, so that it will delight both you and those around you. If you love, you will not express your anxieties and anxieties, if from your feelings your beloved only twitches. Tense asking: “Why didn’t you call? How could you? I was so worried about you!” – a loving person will suffer, but if your beloved feelings are not needed by a loved one now, take them away.
Many men are sincerely convinced that their jealousy is a manifestation of their love. Yeah, and then women have to be taught how to dodge them from this manifestation of love in order to save both themselves and relationships. You can be jealous, if you know how out of your jealousy to make a present for your beloved, if the face of your beloved from your wonderful jealousy blooms and glows like a luxurious bouquet of fresh roses.
Not fewer girls are ready to send dozens of sms per day to a beloved man, believing that it will please him … No, this is overkill, smart men are already annoyed. But one or two SMS is nice only if without reproaches “Why do not you answer?”.
Great theme – languages of love. The ability to love is the ability to transfer your love to another person in the language that is close and clear to him. And there are a lot of languages in love: someone has a closer language of words, someone has a language of actions, someone has a language of touches …
Question to women: do you know what your lover needs if he is sick? For one, the language of love is to sit next to him and feed him from a spoon. And another man in this situation needs to be left alone and not look at him with plaintive eyes! A question for men: what is more pleasant for your beloved – rarely expensive gifts or small signs of attention every day? Words of love or help with housework? Hint: don’t believe the words here, girls sometimes don’t know it themselves …
Not everyone understands that love is not only a feeling. Love is also a skill, a kind of habit and skill, similar to getting up to work every morning. Love is behavior, actions that you perform in the name of … And if you decide to love, then do it as professionally, easily and joyfully as you can. Enjoy the love, enjoy the fact that you love a person.
Do you know how to love? Can you 50 years without fail to love, even if she is sick, thoughtful, chirps without a word or just mischievous? For those who know how to love, love for many years in a row – is easy. Favorite naturally becomes just the one you love. Favorite is a consequence, and the reason for this is that we love him. Love is action, it is a verb. If we put our love in a person, he becomes loved.
Those who want to truly love learn this. How?
Ask yourself often: “And if I loved?”, And you will understand that you can live and react in a different way. With love.